'Creating The Love' Blog

A Positive Look at Life!

~ The Freedom of Forgiving ~

“Creating The Love’ Blog is going to be introducing you to a range of different and wondrous people, who are out there making a huge difference in the world, in their own special way.
I am honoured this week to welcome our very first guest writer and a lady that is so very inspirational to so many!

Lauren Stone

Lauren Stone is a writer, poet, artist and dedicated human rights activist. She is an educator, activist, AP-Breastfeeding-Homebirth advocate. A lightworker and support group facilitator. She is currently planning to build an eco-community.

~   The Freedom of Forgiving  ~

Throughout our lives our hearts are injured by the actions or inactions of others. It is easy over the course of time to accumulate a lot of negative feelings and thoughts towards those who have hurt us. These negative emotions hinder us in so many ways. They actually bind us to those very people for whom we harbor ill feelings.

Anger, bitterness, envy, jealousy, disappointment, hatred are all forms of emotional glue that keep us stuck to the person or people who we have these feelings towards.
So much precious time and energy is wasted stewing in our own juices, being pissed off, feeling sorry for ourselves, plotting revenge, wishing a runaway bus would run over the person who transgressed against us.

All the while the one who is hurt the most by our suffering is us. Often the person you are angry with doesn’t even know it or they do not care. They are living their lives, while we are trapped in a cycle of pain that causes more and more damage as time goes by.

How then do we grow beyond these negative feelings and release ourselves from the bondage of self-imposed martyrdom? The answer may be a surprise.

Forgiveness is a very misunderstood concept. Many people seem to think that forgiveness is the overlooking or erasing of a wrong. That if they forgive it means that the offense no longer matters, that it’s “okay” now.

Forgiveness does not require an apology or remorse from the other person or people. It does not does not require their acknowledgement or even their knowledge. Forgiveness does not pardon the offense. Nor does it lessen the universal responsibility of the offender.

What is does do however is break the tie that binds us to the person or people who have hurt us. Forgiveness is not a selfless act. It is a SELF centered act. An action we take for ourselves. To help us heal and move on.

Forgiveness accepts that what has happened cannot be changed. That it is not up to us to seek reprisal for being wronged. The universe will work that out without our help or thought. Forgiveness is a letting go. Letting go of the thoughts and feelings that damage only us.
Forgiveness is a choice we make to free ourselves.

It can be just that simple in some cases, make the choice and let it go. We may feel the need for something more tangible. A ritual, a physical action that symbolizes the letting go.

Here are a few suggestions for a forgiveness ritual;
Write down all your hurts, your anger, your feelings around a person or incident. Really feel it, cry it out, release it all into the fibers of the paper. State your intentions clearly. No longer will you be owned, controlled, hindered by this person’s actions or inactions or an event involving that person. Then burn or bury the paper and with it the ties that bind you to the pain.

In the same way you can speak your pain into a glass container with a lid. When you have finished, sealed the container, wrap it in a plastic bag and break it. Breaking the hold that the negative feelings had over you. Then throw it away.

There are many various rituals for banishing negativity. Do whatever feels most right, most effective for you. The point is to get the feelings out and keep them out. To fill the spaces once occupied by that negativity with love for our newly freed selves.

Once we are free of the negativity that have kept us from growing and expanding, a whole new world of possibilities becomes clear. We can then move forward towards becoming the person we are meant to be. A person filled with unlimited potential and overflowing with love.

Forgive. Let go. Heal. Grow. Become.

Lauren Stone © 2009

Lauren can be contacted here:  goodground@live.com
Thank you so much Lauren for being apart of ‘Creating the love’

Keep ‘Creating The Love’ … in your life  ♥❀Leanna❀♥


December 29, 2009 - Posted by | guidance, love, Metaphysical, motivational, new age, self help, spiritual, spirituality | , , , , , , , , , , ,


  1. Simply wow 🙂

    Comment by Collin | December 29, 2009 | Reply

  2. Thank You Lauren ♥

    Comment by creatingthelove | December 29, 2009 | Reply

  3. I also hv blog on short stories ….plz drop ur valued comments

    Comment by Collin | December 30, 2009 | Reply

    • Your blog is wonderful Collin, thank you for the invite

      Comment by creatingthelove | January 6, 2010 | Reply

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